Have you ever wondered if male rape really happens? Have you ever thought of its possibility? Can a woman rape a man?.. Or do men rape other men….in Africa? We hardly hear anything like that. It is not realistic for a lot of us in Africa. How can a man be raped?? A lot of us would say…it is utterly impossible, it makes no sense. However, reality remains…it happens. There are more men who are sexually abused than you ever imagined.
An unforgettable story I gathered on male rape was how a cobbler died after many girls from a girls’ school took turns on him countless times to get them all satisfied sexually in Ghana. It was reported that the girls wouldn’t stop even though he pleaded with them that he was tired. This cobbler went unconscious and later died. This story was shocking and I had so many questions.
Men find it hard to accept their status of being victims of molestation; Be it rape or any other sexual act. Men are wired to be MEN and anything that threatens that is eliminated. That is why we do not hear stories of molested men. Men are usually molested as children. They are usually molested by family members or close family friends or friends. It seems nonexistent because many men do not pay attention nor even regard some of these happenings as molestation. They regard it as just a mere occurrence that will disappear from their memories after a while….usually it does; at least in their consciousness but in their subconscious, they battle with it everyday.
If you are a girl, you may find out that perhaps your boyfriend may be a victim of sexual molestation. If you are a guy, I may help you realize that perhaps the source of your problems is not witch craft but it is simply not dealing with your molestation issues.
Many men who are victims of sexual molestation were molested by their house helps or babysitters. A guy shared his story of being sexually molested as a child…it did not take much from him to share because he did not see it as such. He narrated his story; as a child, he wanted to go outside to play with his friends in the neighborhood but the maid took the key and inserted it in her ‘vagige’… to my subscribers, I’m sure you are familiar with the word by now. Being a kid, he ignorantly wanted to get the keys so he could go out to play. As he reached for it, the maid got hold of his hand and made him do unimaginable things a little boy could possibly do sexually. This aggravated as time went on into more explicit sexual experiences. “From there I simply knew I was born for this!”, he joked. That statement to him, was a mere joke and a positive effect. However, he has been sex crave as long as I knew him. He has never been in a relationship that lasted for weeks. He has no respect for women and that has been a major cause of his relationships breaking up. Are you fixing the puzzle now?
Men who have been molested by women usually do not express repugnance or regret. They are usually accepting of what happened to them. However, there is also a huge chunk of them who are disgusted, ashamed and angry at the thought of their experience.
It was weird trying to find out about victims of molestation but to my surprise there were too many victims. They were usually willing to talk about it because they felt it was a part of their sexual conquest growing up. However, there was this guy who told me his story of being molested by a maid servant as well. This guy shared his story and all I could read from his expressions were disgust and anger. He didn’t say much but all he vividly described was the foul smell of the maid’s ‘vagige’. ” I never seem to get that smell out of my mind”, he said in disgust. ” I see every woman and all I see is that smell. It is hard for me to think about women romantically without thinking about that smell”, he continued. I got to understand that, the smell was stuck in his mind because of how young he was when he was molested. His young mind was too young to process those things that were happening to him as much as a man would…he therefore accepted things as they were. He grew with it…and he has not been in any relationship before at 27 years.
As for men who have been molested by other men, it is simply a failed quest to get anybody to speak about it. The only time I heard such an incidence was on the news where young boys were raped by their football coach. C’mone, a typical guy whose been a victim of molestation will usually keep it to himself. Besides, “it is not made real if goes unspoken”. It is a shame to be dominated by another man, it is unheard of. But the fact still remains that there a 1001 men in Africa who are molested by other men every other time. If you are a victim, you have got to work on it and not ignore it especially when it affects you.
Some men go through struggles because of molestation of the past. Until they deal with it, their struggles will remain. What are those struggles? Well…;
4.Fear of a particular sex
6.Lack of respect for a particular sex
The list goes on…. Don’t let any of these define you.